Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I've Had It!

Yesterday I kept up with my now-easy calorie intake of "under 700". That's as low as I'm willing to go, and I also worked out. I did some ab work, but the really cool thing that I did was I tried a ten-minute kickboxing workout that was all upper-body work. Punches and twists, combined with what I call the boxer bounce, where you spend the whole time trying to nimbly bounce back and forth from foot to foot as if you were as light on your feet as a real boxer.

I loved it! I'm going to be heading to my favorite used books/DVD/Video/Game store in the next few days to see if I can find a couple of kickboxing workouts, that's for sure.

But this morning, after seeing the same numbers on the scale since Sunday with no change and having to literally force myself to work out yesterday because of what the scale isn't telling me, I've decided to stop weighing myself except for once or twice a week. I'm tired of asking the stupid scale for confirmation, when I can get it myself from the ways my body is changing, and the way I feel so great once I work out. The pressure when I step on the scale is amazing, and when it doesn't move, that used to encourage me to work harder. But now that I've been to the doctor and seen not only a pound difference but an actual loss difference, I don't trust my scale as much. When one tells you you lost 7 and the other says 9.5, it's not about the little pound difference that you will always see in your weight because all scales are not perfectly aligned. It's about inaccurate weighing ... one of the scales has to be actually weighing wrong in order to come up with something like that. I choose to believe that the wrong one is mine, since I move it around so much ... and since it isn't the doctor scale which I do trust.

But even without trust for the accuracy of my scale, I am incredibly discouraged when I weigh myself and see no changes. Even a half-pound loss lifts me up and encourages me to work harder. But none, no change? It's just a downer. Especially after several days, it just makes me wonder why the hell I'm busting my ass, I feel like I'm not getting anything out of it anyway.

But then I remember something. I am getting something out of it. Whether my weight changes or not, I am increasing my body's fitness and endurance. I am working muscles that are meant to be worked, moving a body that is meant to be moved. Sure I wish the body was smaller, but right now I'm just going to take care of the one I have, I'm going to work it, and not because it makes me shrink, but because it makes me happy and keeps me healthy.

See you at the next weigh-in!