Saturday, February 20, 2010

So Much Has Changed...

It's been about a month since I was here last, but it seems like so much longer. Everything in our life is so different now ... I almost feel like a different person. In the weeks since I last wrote here, we have finally replaced our car that broke down over the holidays, Teenybop turned six years old as one of the top readers in her kindergarten class, and Fiance and I both had birthdays as well. We have finally been able to retain an attorney to work on really severing my ties to Ex-Husband, and I got my first pedicure.

But what really makes all the difference is that Fiance finally did enlist. We were talking one night right after he had signed his contract, and somehow the movie "Saving Private Ryan" came up. Ever since, he's sort of been nicknamed Private Ryan in our house. He leaves for training on April 13th, and at that time, in the moment when he really kisses us goodbye and boards the Army bus to the airport, I will be officially an Army girlfriend. And until he is able to call or come home again, all I will have left of him is memories, pictures, letters ... This will be one of the hardest experiences of my life. But after all we've been through, I believe my family will weather the storm and my Private Ryan and I will come out stronger in the end.

In the meantime, we are struggling to fill the days with good memories to hold onto, and trying hard to ignore April 13th even as it looms ever closer overhead. And as hard as the separation time will be, I believe that it will help us bridge the communication gap that has grown between us. Because as infrequently as he might be allowed to call, and as infrequently as he might have time to write or email ... finally the miles between us will drive us to talk about us again, and that would be great.